ISIS

The Latest Weapon Employed By ISIS In Syria Is A Texas Plumber’s Old Truck

By | 14 Comments

Sold in 2013, the truck somehow made it overseas and joined the fighting in Syria. Globalization is weird.

drones

This Guy Passed The Time By Flying His Drone Copter While Stuck In Houston Traffic

By | 3 Comments

One man in Houston managed to use his drone copter to pass the time during a traffic jam, leading to some exciting photographic proof.

missing brains

100 Brains Were Allegedly Stolen From The Most Gruesome Collection At The University Of Texas

By | 8 Comments

University administrators promise heads will roll, they just need to find them first.

Conspiracy Theories

Introduce Yourself To The Insane Theory That Proves Alex Jones Is Really Bill Hicks

By | 12 Comments

An online video has sparked an insane debate over the possibility that radio host Alex Jones is actually late comedian Bill Hicks.

WU TANG CLAN

Texas Gubernatorial Candidate Wendy Davis Reps Wu-Tang At The Polls

By | 24 Comments

A vote for Wendy Davis is literally a vote for A Better Tomorrow.

DRUNK PEOPLE

Two Drunk Guys In San Antonio Got Into An Argument About Wrestling And One Of Them Got Shot

By | 13 Comments

A drunken argument about wrestling turned into a drunken wrestling match, which turned into a shooting.

HOT FOR TEACHER

A Texas Teacher Allegedly Had Sex ‘All Summer Long’ With One Of Her Students

By | 63 Comments

Ashley Zehnder, 24, is in big trouble for having an affair with a student at the high school where she teaches.

BEER PONG

A Beer Pong Match In Texas Got Ugly When The Losers Opened Fire

By | 9 Comments

Two men reportedly fired into a crowd at a party after they'd lost a game of beer pong.

Ebola

Nephew Of Dallas Ebola Victim Claims He May Have Survived If He Were White

By | 39 Comments

The family of Thomas Eric Duncan is claiming that the Texas hospital that treated him for Ebola mistreated him due to his class and race.

#Matthew McConaughey

Watch Matthew McConaughey’s Chest-Thumping Pep Talk To The University Of Texas Football Team

By | 13 Comments

Matthew McConaughey's pep talk to the University of Texas football team will make you want to run through a brick wall.

#Conan

Texas Clearly Has Their Best Doctors On Hand To Stop The Spread Of Ebola

By | 5 Comments

Conan shows that Texas is very equipped to handle any possible spread of the Ebola virus.

THE UNDERTAKER

The Undertaker Is Appearing At A Family Fun Run And Kayfabe Is Officially Dead

By | 12 Comments

The Undertaker will be appearing at a rural Texas family fun run. Reminder: he has Satanic lightning powers and is doing a FAMILY FUN RUN.

#Food

Proof That The Worst Pizza Topping Really Is Some Guy’s Balls

By | 13 Comments

A Texas teenager has been arrested for rubbing his balls on a customer's pizza without their consent.

rick perry

Rick Perry Was All Smiles For His Booking And Then He Got Some Ice Cream

By | 15 Comments

Texas Governor Rick Perry turned himself in on charges of abuse of power today, and he followed it up with a delicious scoop of ice cream.

#Independent Wrestling

Lance Hoyt Threatened To Kill Me. My Response Will Shock You! (It Won’t, I’m Terrified.)

By | 74 Comments

Last month, former WWE/TNA and current New Japan Pro Wrestling star Lance Hoyt said he'd find me and kill me. I responded. Send help.

WALMART

A Teenager Built Compounds To Live Secretly Inside A Texas Walmart For Days

By | 13 Comments

A 14-year-old boy took Walmart's 'Save Money, Live Better' slogan just a little bit too literally.

BOOKER T

Booker T Threw Out The First Pitch For The Astros And It Was A Strike, SUCKA!

By | 15 Comments

WWE Hall of Famer Booker T threw a great first pitch for the Astros last night, before Orbit showed him a proper spinaroonie.


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