Jimmy Kimmel Sent Guillermo To The NBA Finals Media Day And It Was Hilarious

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'Jimmy Kimmel Live' security guard Guillermo made his way back to the NBA Finals media day again, and he still had no luck with LeBron.


Dirk Nowitzki Gave Conan O'Brien The Texas Citizenship Test

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Dallas Mavericks star Dirk Nowitzki stopped by Conan on his first night in Dallas to administer the Texas Citizenship Test. It involves beef and photoshops.


Tony Parker Shot The Worst Free Throw Ever And It’s Worse Than You’re Imagining

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Tony Parker of the San Antonio Spurs now holds the world record for worst free throw ever after this effort from Wednesday's Bulls/Spurs game. Good lord.

empty threats

Shut Up, David Stern

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Last night, as I was initially excited to watch what felt like the first honest-to-Cthulhu good Thursday Night Football game of the season, word broke across the Twitters and some sports network that doesn’t like to source other reporters that the San Antonio Spurs would be playing without the team’s stars – Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobili and Tony Parker – against the Miami Heat.


Sorry, San Antonio Spurs, I Like Your HEB Commercial But I’m Still Going To Randalls

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It's not as low-rent as the <a href="http://withleather.uproxx.com/2012/11/oklahoma-city-thunder-norman-chrysler-jeep-dodge-commercial" target="_blank">Oklahoma City Thunder shilling Jeeps</a>, but here are the San Antonio Spurs in a commercial for steaks from Texas supermarket chain H-E-B because, hey, I have that grocery store.


Tony Parker, Justin Bieber Used As Examples Of People We Want In Our Country

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Illinois representative Luis Gutierrez knows the secrets to arguing about important, real-life things on the Internet -- sarcasm, topicality and, if possible, Justin Bieber-related photoshops.


Will Drake And Chris Brown Fight Each Other For $1 Million? No.

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In the wake of what has turned into one of the sissiest bar fights to ever involve two hip hop stars, multiple people are now looking for pay days.


Tony Parker Was Involved In The Chris Brown And Drake 'Bottlegate'

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Details are still trickling in regarding <a href="http://www.uproxx.com/music/2012/06/yet-another-vert-important-chris-brown-v-drake-update/">last week’s random night club brawl between the posses of Chris Brown and Drake</a>, but what we do know so far is that Brown and his people have already been to the police and told a tale that makes everything sound like it’s all Drake’s fault.


Eva Longoria Taking Her Talents To Divorce Court

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Despite a report from TMZ that San Antonio Spurs guard Tony Parker was divorcing television actress Eva Longoria, it's actually Longoria that has filed to end her marriage of over 3 years to the NBA star.


Eva Longoria Is Distracting

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Eva Longoria was with her boo, Tony Parker, at an exhibition game between USA and France at Madison Square Garden this weekend.



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In a stunning turn of events, Spurs point guard Tony Parker made headlines by doing something that did not -- I repeat, did NOT -- have anything to do with wife Eva Longoria or anonymous gay truck stop sex.

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