Poor hipsters. Thanks to the Internet and other technologies, their ability to pretend they’re special snowflakes and not just entitled, whiny losers who are going to pretend they’re independent and artsy until they either accidentally have children or go broke and thus have to go begging to daddy for a job is constantly threatened as everybody discovers the latest trends before they can be smug about them.
The latest attempt to seem special is going old-school. We’ll explain what’s going on, as well as document an Android smackdown, after the jump.
But, But, But Film Makes My Badly Shot Pictures Important!
First up, the trend among hipsters for analog technology, which is kind of like steampunk, only without the arts and crafts and with a strong dose of smug.
Hot on the heels of The New York Times revealing that pretentious future advertising executives and housewives are using typewriters to turn out their crappy short stories nobody wants to read is the discovery that teenagers, instead of using the crappy, shoddy point-and-shoot digital cameras of today are using the crappy, shoddy, point-and-shoot analog cameras of the 1980s.
The complaint, naturally, is that digital photography is “too perfect” and, hilariously, one teenage hipster even admits they don’t like being on the hook for screwing up their photos, because turning off the flash is haaaaaard, and apparently Daddy won’t buy them a camera with a manual control. Also, it’s totally the camera’s fault you don’t understand the basics of composition!
Of course, screwing around with an old film camera is a time-honored tradition for teenagers who like to think of themselves as tragic and misunderstood, who will later grow up to be drunken bloggers. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to unload the Minolta I stole out of my grandmother’s attic on eBay. And maybe see if I can hock that Selectric I’m using as a doorstop. Daddy needs whiskey.
NVidia Not Enjoying Its Time In the Honeycomb Hideout
Meanwhile, in the grown-up world, NVidia, or at least its inexplicably tan CEO, has decided to weigh in on the fact that for some inexplicable reason, Honeycomb tablets are having their backplates handed to them by Apple.
Jen-Hsun Huang, whose company turns out the Tegra 2 chips that run most Honeycomb tablets, has actually piped up and said out loud what everybody’s been thinking: that nobody wants a 3G tablet, even when Apple makes them, that there’s a total lack of tablet optimized Android apps to make these tablets in any way appealing, and that these things cost too much in relation to the iPad, which starts at $599.
Huang didn’t go as far as to say what everybody knows and is patently obvious: Apple has created interest in a market its competitors have been working in for years, where they should have an advantage, and instead of delivering a killer product and offering Apple some competition, they rushed a product to market in fear and totally screwed the pooch, letting the control freak from Cupertino clown them. Again.
Instead he claimed that these problems had been solved with a new wave of lighter, thinner tablets. People aren’t sure what tablets he’s talking about, but they think he means Samsung’s new line of Galaxy tablets.
You know, the ones that have been greeted with yawns. Yeah, we think Apple’s really scared.
- Hipsters discover that blaming the technology covers up for their lack of talent really well, will learn the hard way it doesn’t fly in college. (CNET)
- NVidia CEO admits what everybody’s been thinking…until he starts praising the Galaxy Tab. (Engadget)
- In Twitter news, the creator of OMG Facts and the guy who got it a whole bunch of followers are suing each other over who owns the OMG Facts brand, the tweets in question, and, of course, money. We only ask the judge make them tweet their complaints. (Yahoo!)
- Oh, and if you care, the PlayStation Network is back up everywhere except Asia. The Store is still down, meaning you can’t download any hats for Portal 2, and probably won’t be able to get at your “L.A. Noire” DLC. In other words, entitled man-children are going to keep up the whining. (PCWorld)
- Sony’s sold 50.3 million PS3s…but there were 77 million PlayStation Network accounts? For what, alts to use in Home? (VHChartz)
- Pathetic B-listers like Soulja Boy and Audrina Patridge can earn up to $10,000 for turning out endorsed tweets. No, they don’t get paid not to endorse products. (OK!)