USA…USA…USA: 20 TV Show Characters Who Embody Everything Great About America

By: 07.02.13  •  44 Comments
kenny powers american flag

Now that we’ve got all that Canada pandering out of the way, it’s time to talk about what really matters: AMERICA. For this week, we celebrate our Independence Day. July 4th will be spent eating massive amounts of food, drinking ungodly gallons of beer from flag-wrapped beer bottles, blowing sh*t up in the sky, and bitching about the new Jay-Z album. It’s going to be great, but until then, I’d like to take a moment to recognize some TV show characters that embody everything occasionally evil, but most greatly about this country of ours. Haha, not Australia — that’s the GREATEST country — but America. It’s the dream we all share. It’s the hope for tomorrow. F*CK. YEAH.

1. Richard Harrow

richard harrow

The right to the world’s most convincing plastic surgery.

2. Stan Rizzo

stan rizzo

The right to grow a magnif(*cking)icent beard.

3. Liz Lemon

liz-lemon-yes-to

The right to LOVE, the right to LIFE, the right to night cheese.

4. Lucille Bluth

lucille-bluth-drunk

The right to get drunk during the day. And afternoon. And late afternoon. And early evening.

5. Daryl Dixon

lil asskicker

The right to name a baby after a physical threat.

6. Keith Charles and David Fisher

keith davidkeith david 2keith david 3keith david 4

The right to BE WITH WHOEVER YOU WANT.

7. Tina Belcher

tina belcher

The right to philosophize (about sex toys).

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