Chuck (NBC) — Hey, Chuck and Sarah are finally together! On tonight’s episode, Fred Willard and Swoosie Kurtz guest star as bickering married spies, which makes Chuck and Sarah think twice about being humping spy partners.
Castle (ABC) — Chef Rocco DiSpirito guest stars. I like Food Network and shows like “Top Chef” just fine, but I’m not a big fan of celebrity chefs showing up on TV all the time. Hey jerkass, get back in the kitchen and make some food. Since we’re not allowed to say that to women any more, we should at least be able to say it to cooks.
Rules of Engagement (CBS) — Commenter “insomniacslounge” sent in this video from the show, in which one of the show’s character’s sings about taking it in the anus from his girlfriend. At least, that’s what I think it’s about. It gets pretty specific, and I don’t know how else to interpret it.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey (Bravo) — Season premiere. Hate. Hate. Hate.
The Price of Beauty (VH1) — Season finale. Hey, remember that time when VH1 gave Jessica Simpson a TV show? I know, right? It hardly seems like it ever happened.
Romantically Challenged (ABC) — I saw this in the listings and was like, “What the hell show is this?” — completely forgetting that I featured its debut just two weeks ago. And I’m not even high on Percocet at the moment. Anyway, if this fails with “Dancing with the Stars” as its lead-in, Alyssa Milano will have to go back to her job having sex with pro baseball players. Here’s hoping she can find her Nuke LaLoosh.