Back in my undergrad days, I used to smoke a buttload of weed. My roommates and I would park it on the couch and watch whatever we could find on TV in the mid-afternoon – usually cop shows. Our absolute favorite was the “World’s Wildest Such and Such” series hosted by the above gentleman, Sheriff John Bunnell. He introduced each set of clips during a brief vignette, where he would drop crappy puns with an unnecessary amount of gravitas. In short, he was Horatio Caine back when Caruso was still farting around on NYPD Blue. All that was missing was a pair of *sunglasses*.
Our favorite of these was the time he said a suspect was arrested with “a party-sized bag of marijuana.” We lost our stoned minds. A party-sized bag? You have no idea how many hours of conversation were spent trying to figure out how much weed fits in a party-sized bag. Sample quote: “Waitwaitwait… we’re missing the point. We have to think like a Sheriff, dude.” You’re right, I have no idea how I got into law school either. Anyway, below the jump I’ve posted an extremely thorough compilation of these vignettes that some hero uploaded to YouTube.
By far, my favorite part of these clips is the utter chaos going on in the background, like they just happened to be filming while the SWAT team is busting up a stash house. Sheriff Bunnell will just be casually walking through the scene delivering his lines (sometimes holding an automatic weapon or wads of seized cash), and behind him cops are detaining suspects, or engaged in a shootout, or prepping for what appears to be a Waco-style siege. And none of it fazes him. The man either has nerves of steel or is more incompetent than Chief Wiggum.