As promised, ABC revealed the cast of the new season of “Dancing with the Stars,” and this is the sort of thing I have to write about even though I don’t watch the show. So let’s just get this over with.
- Previously revealed: Bristol Palin, Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino, David Hasselhoff, Brandy.
- Token old person: Florence Henderson.
- The Kelly Monaco Memorial Hot Chick Whose Body Gets More Ridiculous From Dancing 10 Hours a Day: Audrina Patridge.
- Overweight comic relief: Margaret Cho.
- Singer that middle-aged housewives adore: Michael Bolton.
- Doing it because his girlfriend Eliza Dushku likes the show: Rick Fox.
- Token ABC/Disney cross-promotion: Disney Channel star Kyle Massey.
- Jock: Kurt Warner.
- Not getting put in the corner: Jennifer Grey.
Awww, now I’m sad about Patrick Swayze dying all over again.
In other dancing news, lots of people are losing their minds over the footage of a dog doing a choreographed merengue (see video below). But it’s just Warming Glow’s beloved Mambo Dog in a different outfit (see this post from last November). I keep telling you people: I SEE ALL DOGS ON THE INTERNET. This blog is Ground Zero for dogs doing cool things. It’s barely about television any more. I regret nothing.