Last night’s Halloween episode of “Modern Family” was terrific from top to bottom, but because I am who I am, I’m going to put the spotlight on the subplot about 16-year-old Haley (played by Sarah Hyland, who is mercifully almost 20 years old) and her series of sexy costumes rejected by mother Claire (Julie Bowen). As you can see, Hyland’s fantastic. She’s like a barely-legal Mila Kunis, minus the shame of having been on a TV show with Ashton Kutcher.
If you missed the episode, I strongly recommend watching it on Hulu (or your preferred form of illegal download), but in the meantime here’s a great exchange when Haley rolls out her third and final costume:
Haley: Okay, Mom. You cannot have a problem with this. I’m Mother Teresa.
Claire: Are you kidding me?
Haley: What? I’m her back when she was hot.
Claire: I will pay you ten dollars to put on more clothes.
Alex: Bet that’s the first time you ever heard that one.
By the way, that’s an example of why all the best sitcoms don’t have a laugh track or a live audience: there are three punchlines stacked on top of one another right there, and an audience’s laughter would destroy the comic timing of that exchange. Another thing common to all the best sitcoms? Hot 19-year-olds in skintight Halloween costumes.