The Bachelor (ABC) — Inspired by Faces of the Last Season of Oprah, there’s a new single-serving Tumblr called Faces of Rejected Bachelorettes. It is equal parts hilarious and tragic. Oh, and Raichel? Maybe next time don’t rip out a guy’s wrist hair the first time you meet him. (Your surgeon does nice work, though.)
19 Kids and Counting (TLC) — Season premiere. The Duggars make my eyelid twitch. Every time I think about this show my face twists into a snarl. It’s really unpleasant.
RuPaul’s Drag Race (Logo) — Season premiere. I have no idea where to even look for Logo in my cable listings. I swear! Really I don’t!
Skins (MTV) — Teenage lesbians tonight, yo.
Castle (ABC) — ABC’s teasing us with the promise that Castle and Beckett get closer than ever tonight, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up. That Beckett chick is frigid.
Gossip Girl (CW) — First new episode in a while. Hey, how about that Roommate movie with Leighton Meester and Minka Kelly? Now THAT’S a worthwhile remake. I enjoyed single white female, but I definitely approve of setting it in college with hotter girls as the leads. Of course, that’s what I say about EVERY movie.