Chuck Lorre — the creator of CBS hits “Two and a Half Men,” “The Big Bang Theory,” “Mike & Molly,” and “Three Farts and a Bike Horn” — places a different witticism at the end of every show he produces. After last night’s episode of “Two and a Half Men,” the card that ran was a dig at Charlie Sheen:
I exercise regularly. I eat moderate amounts of healthy food. I make sure to get plenty of rest. I see my doctor once a year and my dentist twice a year. I floss every night. I’ve had chest x–rays, cardio stress tests, EKG’s and colonoscopies. I see a psychologist and have a variety of hobbies to reduce stress. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t do drugs. I don’t have crazy, reckless sex with strangers.
If Charlie Sheen outlives me, I’m gonna be really pissed.
I think that’s perfectly fair. Lorre created “Two and a Half Men,” and now his cash cow may die because the star is a reckless drug-abusing assh*le. But check out the self-serious finger-wagging Lorre got from TV Guide:
Jeers to Chuck Lorre for biting the hand that feeds him — and his entire crew.
Jeez, Chuck, we know you’re a comedy writer, but on the very same day when the star of your show gave a disturbing interview to Dan Patrick in which he implied he can handle smoking crack “socially,” do you really want to make a joke about his potential death?
Yes. Yes, he should joke about Charlie Sheen dying. And you know why? Because Sheen’s a spoiled piece of sh*t who’s spent the last twenty years doing drugs and abusing women, and if he dies it will be his own fault. Screw Charlie Sheen. The world will be safer without him.
UPDATE: As commenter Timmo pointed out, this isn’t the first crack Lorre’s taken at Sheen. Previous examples happened in January and November.
