E! True Hollywood Story: Snooki (E!) — There are no words to properly thank whoever made this GIF. Still punchin’ after all these years.
Biography Remembers (BIO) — A tribute to Amy Winehouse. Biography must have had this thing cued up for years.
So You Think You Can Dance (Fox) — Lady Gaga and director Rob Marshall (Chicago) sit in on the judges’ panel.
Meat America (History) — Chef Jamie Stachowksi chronicles America’s love affair with meat. I inherently trust any chef with “chow” in his last name. Unless he’s Chinese. If I learned anything from the Korean War, it’s to not trust the Chinese.
Soccer (ESPN2) — MLS All-Stars versus Manchester United. I like soccer and I won’t be watching.
Franklin & Bash (TNT) — James Van Der Beek guests stars. Damn, Dawson and Zack Morris on the same show in 2011. Those guys really know how to weather a drought.
Deadliest Warrior (Spike) — Joan of Arc versus William the Conqueror. You gotta be kidding me. The guy has “the Conqueror” IN HIS NAME.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Connie Britton on Letterman; Chris Tucker on Leno (timely!); Olivia Wilde (rawr!) on Kimmel; Neil Patrick Harris and They Might Be Giants on Fallon; Rachel Weisz on “The Daily Show”; and Kevin Connolly and Jeff Lewis on Conan. Damn, Conan landed two of the top five from my list of the twenty most punchable face on TV.