Echoing the example set by NFL wide receiver Plaxico Burress, an Arizona man shot himself in the groin while tucking a pistol into his waistband, thus creating the impetus for this enlightening local news segment from ABC15. Reporter Corey Rangel gives us all the important details, like how the gun is pink and belongs to the man’s girlfriend, and that the bullet went through the man’s penis. More importantly, Rangel sought out local citizens for some of the most enlightening man-on-the-street interviews you’ll ever see. This is pretty much how half of the news report goes:
Rangel: Tell me, sir, do you think getting shot in the penis would hurt?
Every guy interviewed: Ouch! Oh yeah.
Rangel: You heard it here first, folks: local men don’t like the idea of getting shot in the genitals. Back to you, Kevin.
Someone alert the Pulitzer board, because Corey Rangel’s got that ish wrapped up. And get me the Arizona Tourism Commission on the phone, too — I’ve got a new slogan for them. “Arizona: like Texas, but without the charm or intellect.”
(thanks to Vince for the tip)