Springfield and its neighboring towns Shelbyville and Capitol City are filled with hundreds of characters that have appeared on “The Simpsons,” and many of them were intended to show up in one episode. For instance, Gil wasn’t supposed to be one of the show’s most beloved characters; he was just supposed to be on the show as a schmuck once, and then disappear to Dr. Marvin Monroe Land. But the fans loved him, so he stayed. Some characters aren’t so lucky, though, even if they’re equally as adored. On the next few pages are the ten greatest characters from “The Simpsons” who have appeared once and only once, voiced by one of the main actors (meaning: no guest stars, including Phil Hartman and Albert Brooks).
And before you wonder where he is, know that Rex Banner was voiced by Dave Thomas and Freddy Quimby has appeared in three episodes. Be sure to add your favorites in the comments section. (Will, the guy who ate a lot of cheese, would like to nominate the Creepy Frogurt Guy, and I’m mad at myself for not being able to fit in Knight Boat, the Crime-Solving Boat.)
To the Beemobile—I mean, the list!
#10. Shelbyville Manhattan (“Lemon of Troy”)
For the first five seasons of the show, I remember thinking, “What ‘The Simpsons’ needs is more incest jokes.” Then at the end of season six, in “Lemon of Troy,” we meet Shelbyville Manhattan, the founder of Springfield’s rival town and advocate of being able to marry your cousin. In fact, that’s the whole point of him and Jebediah moving—HEY LOOK, AN OLD MAN’S TALKING.
#9. Bruno, Gus, and Andy (“Bart vs. Australia”)
I recently had a long talk with an Australian who was visiting America for the second time in his life. Throughout the evening, we kept trading “In Australia, do they…?” and “Here in America, are there…?” questions back and forth, and I asked whether he had ever seen the “Simpsons” episode about the Land Down Under. He had, and said [to be spoken like Paul Hogan], “Yeah, that’s a very dunny rat and accurate representation, mate, and a corker of an episode, too,” including the beer-drinking, inner tube-floating nude prime minister Andy. (Slight editorial additions to his speech were added.)
#8. Cracker Executive (“A Milhouse Divided”)
The cracker executive (note: not racist) has a point. I don’t think unhappy people eat crackers, because that would just further their sadness. Those little, salty rectangles and/or circles just scream, “This is all I can afford, and because I’m alone in my bachelor pad apartment with my racing car bed, I just don’t care enough to unpeel the cheese wrapper to make an actual sandwich.” They’re happy people food, particularly married people food, and that’s why he fires Kirk after his split from Luann. That, and Kirk took the number one cracker factory in town into a tie for sixth, with Table Time and AlliedBiscuit.
I want more like this!
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