If you’re not familiar with him from re-airings of “The Graham Norton Show” on BBC America, Graham Norton brings a level of irreverence you never see in American late-night shows. It’s not just that he’s witty and funny, it’s that he brings out the best in his guests. He makes them seem real and funny and human and genuine instead of fake and plastic and rehearsed, which is the way most celebrities appear on even the best American talk shows. Norton’s ability to bring out the best in his guests, however, is not just limited to English celebs; he gets the best out of everyone. Like Salma Hayek, who confirmed what most of us already know: God prefers D Cups.
“I was the youngest in class and all these girls were starting to get them (breasts) and I wasn’t getting anything – I was really scared. I was getting teased a lot because everyone was older and I was the skinny tomboy. I went to a church that had a saint that was supposed to do a lot of miracles. I put my hands in the holy water and went: ‘Please Jesus give me some boobs.” (Source)
Can you imagine what would happen if the praying powers of Salma Hayek and Tim Tebow were combined? The NFL would be full of terrible quarterbacks with huge breasts. They would look like an Alison Brie Running GIF, they’d throw like Ned Flanders, and they’d WIN. Somehow, some way, despite no discernible talent and massive cleavage that affected their throwing motion, the Denver Broncos’ quarterbacks would lead the league in victories, incompletion percentage, and cup size and ratings would go through the roof.
