What's On Tonight: Kate Upton Will Teach Jimmy Fallon How to Dougie

Justin Bieber: All Around the World (NBC) — The great part about this documentary concert series in support of his new album is that there is no great part.

Futurama (Comedy Central) — In the seventh season premiere, Bender fathers a child with the office soda machine, and despite that, it will feel more real and humane than 90 percent of what’s on television.

Baby Daddy (ABC Family) — This new show is about a guy who decides to raise his daughter after his ex leaves it on his doorstep. See what I mean about “Futurama”?

Health Inspectors (Food Network) — This reality show — about a health inspector who goes into restaurants to help them remedy their violations — combines my two favorite things: Fancy cuisine and death by e coli.

Royal Pains (USA Network) — Henry Winkler guest stars tonight. I hope his character needs medical attention after suffering an injury attempting a shark jump.

LATE NIGHT LISTINGS: Kate Upton is on Fallon. Why Fallon and not Conan? Out of fear of The Masturbating Bear. Meanwhile, Alec Baldwin will be on Letterman, and I’m certain a recent controversy will be addressed; Andy Samberg is on Leno; Martin Short does Kimmel (hopefully he won’t ask about his dead wife); and Steve Carell will be on “The Daily Show.” His appearances are always fun because typically all they do is mock one another for five minutes.

Header Image via GQ

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