Parks and Recreation (NBC, 9:30 p.m.) — Season premiere. TV is so good tonight that even Ben is happy. The Parks premiere is split evenly between being set in Pawnee and Washington DC, and features guest appearances from Senators John McCain, Olympia Snowe, and Barbara Boxer. They’ll bring in the big ratings.
SNL: Primetime Election Special (NBC, 8 p.m.) — If the first sketch isn’t about the secret Romney footage and isn’t great, don’t even bother watching the rest of the special.
Thursday Night Football (NFL Network, 8 p.m.) — The New York Giants take on my Carolina Panthers in Charlotte. I’m the only non-Giants or Jets fan in my family, so this game MATTTERS. If the Panthers win, it means being able to rub a week three regular season victory in their faces for the rest of their lives. HAHAHA.
Up All Night (NBC, 8:30 p.m.) — Season premiere. In a wise retooling, The Ava Show is no longer, presumably so Maya Rudolph’s character can spend more time covering Prince with the Roots.
The Office (NBC, 9 p.m.) — Season premiere. The second beginning of the end. The first beginning of the end was every episode after Michael Scott departed.
Glee (Fox, 9 p.m.) — Not so much an endorsement of the show as it is an excuse to look at this GIF for the 684th time today. The video is nice, too.
Wilfred/Louie (FX, 10 p.m.) — Wilfred airs its season finale, while we finally get to see Louie’s talk show on Louie. And hopefully at least one more appearance from David Lynch.
Awkward. (MTV, 10:30 p.m.) — Season finale. For the two people here who watch it, #teammatty.
Childrens Hospital/NTSF: SD: SUV:: (Cartoon, 12 a.m.) — And don’t forget about these shows. Childrens Hospital has been spectacular this season.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Nathan Lane and the Killers on Letterman; Viola Davis, Paul Wesley, and Bonnie Raitt on Leno; Nikki Reed and Mitch Albom on Ferguson; Piers Morgan and Michael Peña on Fallon; Ricky Gervais and Tig Notaro on Conan; Bill Clinton on Stewart; and Errol Morris on Colbert. And to this night in general: