5. NFL Network “Serious Fun”
If the casting notice that went out to find the guy for these spots called for a “skinnier, less endearing version of Zach Galifianakis,” then they certainly found the right guy!
4. Geico “Neanderthal”
Nothing against Brian Arakpo, but why did Geico hire him to be a pitchman for them? It just seems so random to me. And what the hell is a pancake social, anyway?
That ominous commercial in which a guy supposedly famous for making “outrageous predictions” wants you to go to his website and watch a video he’s made: probably a scam artist, right? Probably a scam artist.
2. Kay Jewelers “Open Hearts”
Hey all you dudes out there dating or married to women with daughters not fathered by you: want to know the secret to winning BOTH of their hearts? Buy both of them jewelry at Kay, of course! (Punches self in nuts, vomits)
1. Citi Private Pass: The Ex
Bros, if your personality is so lacking color that you need a certain credit card to make you “less boring,” do everyone a favor and find the nearest Port-O-Potty to drown yourself in.