This is about a quarter as inspired and on the mark as Jimmy Kimmel’s premier Twitter segment, “Celebrities Read Mean Tweets,” but Rob Delaney is good at 140 characters or less, and old ladies in a deli reading messages involving shipyards and bad decisions will always be OK in my book, so there you go.
Spoiler alert: You’ll never be more excited to have not been born in China.
And for good measure here’s Rob’s standup set from later in the show. Not his finest stuff and — shockingly — the audience doesn’t love a good speedball joke as much as I do.
