Coming Soon To Your TV: The Notorious B.I.G., Helpful Cartoon Ghost

EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING AND READ THIS.

It has been sixteen years since rapper Notorious B.I.G was was killed in a hail of gunfire in a drive by on a Los Angeles, California, street.

But two days after the anniversary of his murder, the rapper’s children have announced Biggie Smalls will be given new life as a cartoon character. [Daily Mail]

More. I must know more. Immediately.

His children, 16-year-old C.J. Wallace and 19-year-old T’yanna Wallace, will star in a cartoon series set in their late father’s Brooklyn, New York, studio.

According to the Associated Press, B.I.G, whose real name is Christopher Wallace, will appear in ‘spirit’ and ‘guide them through the adversities they face’ when trying to keep the Brooklyn studio open and out of a larger company’s hand.

Created by Ossian Media the group announced on Monday that the cartoon named House of Wallace has yet to sign with a network.

Hold on. Holdonholdholdon. There is cartoon being shopped right now that features Biggie Smalls as some sort of ghost/fairy godmother hybrid who presumably will be using hilarious ghost hijinks to prevent wealthy businessmen from acquiring his Brooklyn studio and NO NETWORK HAS SECURED THE RIGHTS TO IT YET? How is that even possible? TV people will throw money at every stupid idea that crosses their desks, but this pitch has been floating out there for a full day and no one has ordered 100 episodes of it? UNACCEPTABLE. I mean, sure, this could end up being a complete travesty that shamelessly exploits the deceased legend in an attempt to make a quick buck. That’s always a possibility. But, on the other hand, BIGGIE SMALLS: GHOST DAD. COME ON.

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