Production note: Our pal VJ Boyd, who co-wrote last night’s episode, will be swinging by a little later this afternoon to answer your questions in the comments. Feel free to load some up for him now and check back later.
Ladies and gentleman, Art Mullen.
The first thing were gonna do is acknowledge that this guy is awesome. He shoots Theo Tonin, fakes his own death in a spectacular fashion, pushes a guy out of an airplane WHILE HE’S FLYING IT, parachutes into Harlan county with enough coke and cash to jump start the economy of a small country, and then he has the balls to get a job in law enforcement not once, but TWO TIMES… he spends a couple days riding around with you while you’re looking for him, and now he’s run off with a hooker that’s half his age. That’s some badass sh-t.
And that about sums it up. It is some badass sh-t, especially when you lay it all out at once like that. Shelby/Drew may have been living a quieter life in recent years, but it’s still been a mighty public one for a man on the run. The dude took part in his own manhunt, for God’s sake. No wonder he broke his legs when he landed in Harlan. He was probably weighed down by his giant brass balls.
And now, the highlights:
- I had forgotten how much Limehouse frightened me. When I first saw him pop up on screen I was excited, like you would be upon seeing an old friend (“LIMEHOUSE!”), but after about 30 seconds I remembered that, oh yeah, he likes to give menacing speeches while brandishing a giant bloody knife, and is just a terrifying human being, in general.
- Aaaaaaaand there’s your explanation for why Arlo took Drew’s secret to the grave, and why so many criminal-types seem to be willing to do the same: His cocaine put food on their tables and Christmas presents under their trees way back when. Maybe I missed that earlier, but Drew’s speech to Boyd definitely cleared it all up.
- JUSTIFIED SPIN-OFF PITCH: Boyd Crowder: Young Rascal. That’s all I could think about during Johnny’s speech in the trailer. Half-finished treehouses, half-finished go-karts, stealing candy to score cigarettes… he’s like a 50% more dastardly version of Tom Sawyer. Would watch.
- Speaking of spin-offs, let’s give Rachel and Tim their own show while we’re at it, too. He can sass her to and from crime scenes, she can sing showtunes to get him to stop, they can both shoot people in the face once they get there. Would also watch.
- Two “whore’s underwear” related thoughts: 1) I love that Rachel owns a pair and is willing to tell Raylan just to make him feel uncomfortable. 2) I love that Raylan figured out Ellen May was with Drew because of underpants.
- Line of the night goes to blonde hooker Teri, who said this about Ellen May: “If she had someone she could count on, I guess she wouldn’t be sucking hillbilly dicks for money, would she?” A fair point.
- Speaking of Ellen May, I just feel bad for her at this point. Everything she touches turns to sh-t. Will someone please take her out to a nice Mexican dinner?
- Of course Wynn Duffy wears a sleeping mask. Of course.
- Kinda thought we might have had our Tim/Colton standoff last night after the marshals snagged Drew. Was really excited. Will continue waiting.
- One question: Why did Colton take off? Shouldn’t he have stayed to get the money, or at least to ensure the drop went as planned?
- Somewhat off-topic, but Salon ran a piece the other day titled “Justified is too flip about violence, even for this devoted fan.” Allow me to make two counterpoints: 1) NO. 2) It’s like people complaining about TV violence in 2013 never watched Crockett and Tubbs waste every single drug kingpin and money launderer in Miami for most of the 1980s. Relax, y’all.
- EVERYBODY RUNNIN’. Boyd and Ava might be running (in addition to their Tonin problems, this Ellen May thing could go really, really bad for them now), Wynn Duffy might take the old Wynn-ebago to the Great White North, and the marshals are gonna try to run out of Harlan with Drew (and alive, preferably). Take it away, Ghostface.
As always, the GIFs from Chet Manley are on the following pages. Please do not threaten me with a drill or spit in my face.