Twenty-four years ago today, on December 17, 1989, The Simpsons became arguably the greatest show of all-time. Granted, it would take a few seasons to get there, but without “Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire” (written by Mimi Pond, who never penned another episode), there wouldn’t be a “A Streetcar Named Marge,” a “Bart Gets an Elephant,” a “The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular,” and the world would be a far worse place.
In honor of The Simpsons‘ birthday (it can almost rent a car!), here are 24 holiday-themed (minus “Treehouse of Horror”) ways to celebrate this most special of days. Now to find a cheap Superstar Celebrity Microphone…
1. Announce your annual screening of The Christmas That Almost Wasn’t But Then Was.
3. Six simple words: “Simpsons birthday, gone drinkin’, no disturb.”
4. Watch “totally” “legal” episodes online, including “Mr. Plow” for an eighth time this year.
5. Yell this the next time Family Guy is on TBS.
6. Perform a traditional Santa Claus of the South Seas dance.
8. Remember The Simpsons that was…
10. Throw out all your stuff, minus that SQUISHEE cup you got from 7-Eleven a few years ago.
11. BUY ME SEASON FIVE OR GO TO HELL.
12. Agree to disagree that season twelve is underrated.
13. Get a tattoo celebrating your favorite show.
14. Make your XBox gamertag “Thrillho.”
15. Eat a meatball sandwich with a side of Chippos, just because.
16. Laugh at those who don’t understand why “Monster Mash” is the best Valentine’s Day song.
17. Get drunk, take a nap, dream of Pukahontas.
18. Plan for brutal winter storms sure to come: buy an extra battery for your laptop to play DVDs.
19. Forget that you didn’t remember the show’s birthday.
20. Pony up $2,195 for a Simpsons 4 Player Arcade Game.
21. Take comfort in knowing that 24 years from now, we’ll be celebrating episode #1,080.
