I have a few questions about Dannon Oikos’ Super Bowl commercial:
1. Are Bob Saget, John Stamous, and Dave Coulier playing themselves, or are Bob Saget, John Stamos, and Dave Coulier playing Danny Tanner, Jesse Katsopolis, and Joey Gladstone?
2. If they’re playing Danny, Jesse, and Joey, when did they move out of their old house?
3. Where’s the rest of the family?
4. I mean, it’s the Super Bowl. Where’s Becky? Comet? Mr. Woodchuck? DID THEY EAT MR. WOODCHUCK?
5. Is this image, from Dannon’s website, the most horrifying thing ever?
That last one I can answer myself: yes.