Confirmed: Univision Has Better New Shows Than American TV Networks

Not to be outdone by all the big American television announcements this week, Univision also released its slate of upcoming shows for the 2014-15 season. In addition to five new dramatic series with titles that translate to — and I am not joking here — Miss Gunpowder, The Drug Lord, Demented Criminal, The Feast of the Goat, and At the Devil’s Table, the network also picked up four new telenovelas (Spanish soap operas, essentially), two of which have plots that appears to be 10 or 15 different kinds of bonkers/wonderful.

First, Hasta el Fin del Mundo, which translates to Until the End of Time:

This is the intricate tale of Sofia, the oldest of three sisters, who takes the helm of her family’s chocolate factory after her father’s death. Engaged to a man who is ambitious and using her as a stepping stone, she feels an immediate and mutual attraction to Salvador, a race-car driver who, due to some unfortunate circumstances, is working as her chauffeur. Sofia and Salvador never tire of demonstrating that despite the hurdles, love is possible. The telenovela stars Marjorie De Sousa, international singing sensation Pedro Fernandez, Julian Gil and Claudia Alvarez, and is produced by Nicandro Diaz. (Monday – Friday, Primetime, Televisa)

And next, Mi Corazón es Tuyo, or My Heart is Yours, which…

Life’s journey hasn’t been easy for Ana who works as an exotic dancer in a club and has just lost the home she struggled to own. She knows she has to start over. Through a clerical error at an employment agency, Ana finds herself applying for the job of “nanny” to a wealthy widower, Fernando, with seven difficult children. Somehow, without credentials or a cultured background, Ana manages to charm the children and help in the recovery process from the loss of their mother. Meanwhile, Fernando pursues a woman with a suitable pedigree, but it becomes increasingly obvious that he is smitten with Ana and she is smitten with him. Featuring Silvia Navarro, Jorge Salinas, Mayrín Villanueva, and is produced by Juan Osorio. (Monday – Friday, Primetime, Televisa)

To recap: While American television is busy greenlighting shows about familiar comic book characters and selfies and ALMOST NOTHING ELSE, our Spanish-speaking brothers and sisters are getting (a) a show about the heiress to a candy fortune falling for her disgraced race-car driver chauffeur, (b) what appears to be a version of The Nanny that replaces Fran Drescher’s character with a stripper, and (c) that Colombian Breaking Bad remake where Saul Goodman is named Saul Bueno and hosts a late-night talk show.

That settles it. We are all learning Spanish.

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