Jon Bon Jovi Should Be Using His Time-Travel Powers For Good

06.07.16 2 years ago 9 Comments

It was either ancient Chinese general and philosopher Sun Tzu or Spider-Man’s uncle who said, “With great power comes great responsibility,” but either way, it’s a fair point. In an ideal world, those who possess an ability to help at a higher level should use that ability to better the world, to whatever degree they can. Whether it’s donating money and time to charity, or using influence within the system to help the less fortunate, or whatever. It’s the right thing to do, and it brings me to something that has really been bugging me lately.

Jon Bon Jovi should be using his time-travel powers for good.

By now you’ve surely seen Bon Jovi’s DirecTV commercials, but for the sake of clarity, here’s a quick rundown anyway: A couple is sitting at home watching television. Suddenly, boom, Bon Jovi appears out of thin air, guitar in hand, and begins singing a song about “the power to turn back time” as it relates to recording television shows. To illustrate this, he uses other examples of things one can do with time travel, like buy spicier salsa, or get back with an old lover, or not have a second child, and then he makes all of those things happen.

Two things jump out here:

  • Bon Jovi has either developed the power of teleportation or has become an extremely efficient burglar with the almost ninja-like ability to break into someone’s house and sneak up behind them in their living room without them noticing.
  • Bon Jovi has developed the ability to alter history with the point of a finger.

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