Y’all remember Bristol Palin, right? Knocked-up daughter of John McCain’s dipsh*t vice-presidential nominee who supports teenage abstinence for all teenagers except for those that really want to have sex? Well, it’s been four years, a ghost-written novel, a turn on Dancing with the Stars, her acting debut on The Secret Life of an American Teenager, and even a PSA suggesting to other teenagers to “think before you f*ck,” and suddenly, that little unborn fetus is a fully realized member of the class wonton douchebrattery.
Cute little Tripp Palin is all growed up now and he is an absolute terror. To wit: In a clip from Bristol Palin’s puntastic reality show, Life’s a Tripp, Bristol and her sister, Willow, took a trip to Phoenix with the little devil spawn. In the clip below, Bristol admits that she’s “doing a terrible job” of disciplining Tripp (PROBABLY BECAUSE SHE’S A TEENAGER). Evidence of that is on full display, as Tripp morphs into one of those children you hear about in Louis C.K.’s stand-up acts. Tripp wants to go to the hotel pool, Bristol says no, Tripp tells Bristol and Willow that he hates them, and then after being threatened with a time-out, Tripp says to Willow, “Go Away You F*****!”
Now, there’s some question about what the starred F-word actually is. It sounds like “f*gg*t,” which would put sweet little Trip on even keel with the six-year-old Indiana kid who sang in church that “Ain’t no home going to heaven.” But the producers INSIST that Tripp did not use a gay slur; what he did, instead, was to improperly use the an F-bomb as a noun, when everyone knows that it’s the verb responsible for his very existence.
This, of course, elicited embarrassed laughter from Bristol and her sister, which I might interject, is the EXACT REASON THAT THE LITTLE SH*T CAN GET AWAY WITH LANGUAGE LIKE THAT.
Of course, who knows where he picked up that word, certainly not the saintly Palin household. What I find more disturbing, honestly, is Bristol’s threat: “God’s watching you.” Really, lady? You’re going to pull the God card on a four-year-old? Why don’t you just tell him that the next time he throws a tantrum, Satan will swallow his soul and throw him in an eternal pit of hellfire along with all of Obama’s supporters.