Oh man, it’s a promo for Season 3 of “Jersey Shore,” starting January 6th. It will chronicle our favorite Guidos’ adventures from this past summer, when they returned to their (relatively) native habitat of Seaside Heights, New Jersey. It’s got everything I want from “Jersey Shore”: male braggadocio, JWoww’s tits bouncing, and a drunken Snooki falling on her face. Oh, and there’s a vuvuzela (which they call a “grenade whistle”). Haha, remember vuvuzelas? Those were the days.
Seriously, having skipped out on the last half of Season 2 (too much meddling from producers + boring Ronnie/Sammy drama), I’d kind of forgotten how much I like watching these entertaining train wrecks of human beings. Added bonus: that rancid bitch Angelina is gone, replaced with chunky duckface Deena. It’s almost unthinkable that anyone could be worse than Angelina. Deena could take over the Sudetenland and start eradicating Jews, and I’d still be like, “Well, at least she’s more charismatic than Angelina.”