Obit For Man Who ‘Loved Buttermilk Served In Martini Glasses Garnished With Cornbread’ Is Just Great

Choosing which parts of the obituary of Harry Weathersby Stamps — a retired community college dean from Long Beach, Mississippi — to excerpt was an exercise in extreme frustration, as the whole thing is a beautiful piece of art. But here are the parts I consider to be my personal favorites.

Harry Weathersby Stamps, ladies’ man, foodie, natty dresser, and accomplished traveler, died on Saturday, March 9, 2013.

Harry was locally sourcing his food years before chefs in California starting using cilantro and arugula (both of which he hated). For his signature bacon and tomato sandwich, he procured 100% all white Bunny Bread from Georgia, Blue Plate mayonnaise from New Orleans, Sauer’s black pepper from Virginia, home grown tomatoes from outside Oxford, and Tennessee’s Benton bacon from his bacon-of-the-month subscription. As a point of pride, he purported to remember every meal he had eaten in his 80 years of life.

…

He had a life-long love affair with deviled eggs, Lane cakes, boiled peanuts, Vienna [Vi-e-na] sausages on saltines, his homemade canned fig preserves, pork chops, turnip greens, and buttermilk served in martini glasses garnished with cornbread.

…

Harry traveled extensively. He only stayed in the finest quality AAA-rated campgrounds, his favorite being Indian Creek outside Cherokee, North Carolina. He always spent the extra money to upgrade to a creek view for his tent. Many years later he purchased a used pop-up camper for his family to travel in style, which spoiled his daughters for life.

He despised phonies, his 1969 Volvo (which he also loved), know-it-all Yankees, Southerners who used the words “veranda” and “porte cochere” to put on airs, eating grape leaves, Law and Order (all franchises), cats, and Martha Stewart. In reverse order. He particularly hated Day Light Saving Time, which he referred to as The Devil’s Time. It is not lost on his family that he died the very day that he would have had to spring his clock forward. This can only be viewed as his final protest.

The man hated Law and Order, Martha Stewart and Daylight Savings Time. He and I could have been pals.

In case you were wondering, the obit was written by Stamps’ daughter, Amanda. She wrote it on the trip from Dallas to Long Beach for her father’s funeral. We all should be so lucky to have something like this written about us when we die.

(Pic via Biloxi Sun Herald)