It’s been nearly 10 years since two people hosted the same episode of SNL. In fact, the long-running sketch series double-booked twice in one year, when Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey told tuna jokes on January 17, 2004 and Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen humored musical guest J-Kwon during the season finale four months later, on May 15. Both choices are regrettable in hindsight (actually, they were terrible then, too), but I have a proposition for SNL to make up for their past sins: book Nick Offerman and Megan Mullally, America’s best celebrity couple.
By now you’ve seen the video of the two of them performing “Smell Yo Dick,” the frontrunner for Best Thing of 2013. But that wasn’t an isolated incident: they’ve blown up the Internet multiple times in the past couple of years, ever since Offerman joined the cast of Parks and Recreation, and made us fall for them over and over again. Here’s how they became the exception to the “love is dead” argument. Also, SNL, when you choose them, hire Riskay, too.
#1. Because this is their relationship advice:
We feel that getting into it with a friend is always a sticky wicket, but if you must, put your best foot forward and show her your integrity by revealing the way you feel, and then assuring her that you don’t want to pressure her in any way. If and when she’s interested, she’ll give you the high sign.
Or, while she’s sleeping, whip your dick out and show her who’s boss. Either way.
#2. Because they had a tiny wedding, and in a refreshing Hollywood rarity, she, the 44-year-old, was more famous than he, the 33-year-old, thanks to her Emmy-nominated role on Will & Grace.
#3. Because they’re not afraid to take it all off for our, um, pleasure.
#4. Because they’ve both been on excellent shows…
…occasionally at the same time.
#5. Because this is how Nick throws a surprise birthday party for Megan.