Oh, Janine Turner. She was such a lovely footnote to the ’90s: she had a charming role in a successful TV show (brassy pilot Maggie O’Connell in “Northern Exposure”), and she played the love interest in one of the less-sucky Sylvester Stallone movies of the decade (Cliffhanger). And while she returned to respectable television in one season of “Friday Night Lights,” this is what’s become of her since: a poor man’s Lisa Rinna shilling for something called “Christoga.”
What’s Christoga, you ask? It’s Christian yoga (“yoga-filled body, Christ-filled soul”), and it’s a necessary development because regular yoga secretly spreads blasphemous Hindu teachings.
I guess it goes without saying that she’s part of the Tea Party movement, huh? Great. It’s getting impossible to enjoy a little ’90s nostalgia without some wacko broad opening the door for a political flame war. I guess I’ll toss Janine over here in the crazy pile with Victoria Jackson and Christine O’Donnell.