Previously: “Whites” and “Car Breakup”
Cold Open
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The only thing this tame cold open, about how terrorist organizations are as good at social media as the Secret Service is bad at stopping people from stabbing President Obama (I’m sure putting those three words together won’t come back to haunt me), accomplished was making me excited for the next season of Archer. I cannot wait to see how they handle ISIS. But I digress…
Monologue
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One of the longest monologues in recent memory, but at least there wasn’t any singing? Actually, I quite enjoyed how SNL, like they did with Louis C.K. last season, let Sarah Silverman do her thing for about eight minutes, especially when she was conversing with her younger self from the 1990s. (Weirdly and disappointingly, the monologue was the only time that Silverman’s style, of being a “dirty” comedian who can get away with saying anything because she ends every joke with a smile, was used. Otherwise, she played mostly anonymous characters, not modified versions of herself.) What do you feed the dinosaurs? I love Chris Pratt, but standup comedians often make the best hosts, because they’re already so used to working alone on a stage, as opposed to just working alone, like bloggers.
The Fault In Our Stars 2
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“Because you can’t quarantine your heart.” I can’t believe that’s not already the tagline for some horrible romantic comedy that your aunt probably loves. The Fault In Our Stars 2: The Ebola In Our Everything was a topical spin on something that came out months ago, but I think it would have worked better if the Internet hadn’t already been clogged with Fault parodies. I guess it could’ve been worse, though: at least it wasn’t The Fault In Our Stars 2: The Ice In Our Bucket Challenges.
Joan Rivers In Heaven
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Sarah Silverman’s Joan Rivers impression was solid, and the concept of the departed comedian being welcomed to Heaven was solid, but the execution? Yeesh. Silverman tripped over her lines, and the assembled celebrity impressions are all over the place. Richard Pryor made sense, but a mute Steve Jobs? At least Benjamin Franklin got to make some bisexual jokes, not that he knows what that is.
Weekend Update
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I’m not exactly proud of this, but Weekend Update was probably my favorite part of this episode. You win this round, Jost…though most of the credit goes to Michael Che, who, once he learns to stop silently chuckling at every joke, could turn into one of the best Update anchors ever. His delivery on “Who goes to Texas AND Africa?” was superb, and I even really enjoyed his back-and-forth with Jost on what words each of them isn’t allowed to say. So cray-cray.
Weekend Update: Al Sharpton
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Remember how writer Bryan Tucker commented, “If…you want to get an extra laugh in your script, just add this line: ‘KENAN REACTS.’ Sure, it’s sort of cheating. But we still do it sometimes. Because it works.” The same is true of Kenan saying, “Ms. NBC.”
Weekend Update: Garage and Her
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Pretty sure I saw Garage and Her open for Ani DiFranco at Lilith Fair 1998. Also, couldn’t they have been the musical guest? Also also, where was Pete Davidson tonight?
Poem
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Anything Kyle Mooney and Beck Bennett is usually my comedy sweet spot, but not here. Everything felt just the slightest bit off. Oh well, I’ll just have to watch “Bad Boys” for the 457th time.
Vitamix
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The cast of Supportive Women would be horrified. I’m a big fan of sketches that start off friendly, only to turn hateful and mean, but “Vitamix” was no Cecily and Bobby in the Tennessee Williams-esque “Blue River Dog Food” from last season, because it didn’t go nearly far enough. It was stuck at snotty when it should have gone full OUR DOG IS BRAIN DEAD FROM EATING LITERAL CRAP. Plus, no Peanut:
Maroon 5
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Things I would rather do than listen to Maroon 5:
-Watch the January Jones episode of SNL
That’s it, because that’s literally the second worst thing ever. The worst thing ever: Maroon 5.
