So remember how excited we were that Game of Thrones was almost back? Yeah, those were the days, because now we’re very sad that after Sunday, there won’t be another new episode again until next April. That is a impossibly long time, and I’m not ready for Game, as well as Fargo AND Louie, to leave us in the same three-day stretch next week. It has been a great year of a great show, and we’re going to miss the hell out of it. Here’s what we’ll miss the MOST.
1. The #TrueDetectiveSeason2 pairings.
In order: Tyrion/Oberyn, Brienne/Pod, the Hound/Arya, Margaery/me, and Hot Pie/direwolf bread.
2. The genius of Littlefinger.
The most shady of shady manipulators was a one-man wrecking crew this season. He played a part in killing Joffrey, and literally killed Lysa and Dontos, and oh yeah, he creepy-kissed Sansa, revealed he’s responsible for the War of the Five Kings, and got sickly Robin to go on a tour of the Vale. He was very busy. Also: where does Aidan Gillen place in the post-The Wire power rankings? Obviously Idris Elba is #1, but the race for #2 is cluttered with Gillen, Lance Reddick, Amy Ryan, and Michael K. Williams. Yeah, it’s probably Omar, so he best watch out: Gillen has a history of “dealing with” problems.
3. The evolution of Sansa.
As Sansa Stark has grown into a character you’re actually happy to check in with, so too has Sophie Turner evolved into a remarkable young actress. It’s a good thing fate collided with talent, because unlike in past seasons, where Sansa mostly moped around and pined after boys, she had to grow up and turn into Goth Katniss when shuffled out of King’s Landing, and Turner KILLED in her scenes set in the Vale. Maybe “killed” was a poor choice of words, actually…
4. The escalating madness of Arya.
I don’t think the Internet could handle the Stark sisters reuniting. The last time they shared a scene was back in season one’s “A Golden Crown,” when Sansa was in love with Joffrey. That was ages ago, and since then, they’ve both become different shades of badass: Sansa’s blooming into one, and Arya has activated doesn’t-give-a-f*ck mode. Every time she thinks something good’s about to happen, a different family member dies. She has no choice but to turn into a cold assassin: it’s all she knows anymore.
5. The obvious evilness of Joffrey.
Characters on Game of Thrones for the most part cannot be described as “good” or “evil.” They’re usually somewhere in between…for everyone except Joffrey, that is. He was a rotten weasel who found pleasure in the pain of others. But while it’s nice to write he “was” something, and not “is,” I’ll miss Joffrey. It was fun hating a character so deeply, so purely. It felt good.
6. The brutal violence.
I’d say this one speaks for itself, but it’s hard to speak without teeth. (I should also say that I briefly considered having this list be nothing but Oberyn, but that made me depressed, so I decided against it. He will be/has been missed, though. BRING ON SAND SNAKES.)
7. The why-the-hell-not-we’re-on-HBO nudity.
This season found a happy medium of “nude scenes” and “scenes that served a point.” There were no Littlefinger monologues while two ladies diddled themselves (not that we minded); instead, most of the naked scenes were contained to Oberyn’s sex chamber — I assume the people of Dorne are exposed more often than they’re clothed — and Love Creek outside Meereen, the setting of my favorite screencap ever.
8. The Dinklage.
It’s a nice problem to have: which amazing scene should you submit as your Emmy tape? Do you go with you freaking out during a mockery of a trial, where you got to hiss and spew hot venom, or do you instead choose your quizzical monologue about beetles in a prison? Despite being locked in the dark, Peter Dinklage’s brilliance shined bright all season, and now I really hope the impossibly tough Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series category will be decided by Trial by Combat. WHO YOU GOT: TYRION VS. PINKMAN VS. RICHARD HARROW.
9. The everything, well, everything.
I wish I could lie and say we’re at just the tip of Game of Thrones‘ greatness, but that’s probably not true. When the show’s gone for good, we’ll likely look back at seasons three and four as its finest. The HBO’s show creeping into A Feast for Crows and A Dance with Dragons territory, and honestly, those books aren’t as interesting as the ones preceding them. They’re not without their undeniable charms and HOLY SH*T NO HE DIDN’T moments, but don’t expect anything as remarkable as the Red Wedding, the Purple Wedding, and the Mountain vs. Red Viper in the same 12-month span. I hope I’m wrong, and I’m sure George R.R. Martin and the showrunners will come up with something awesome (giants riding dragons riding mammoths?), but just in case, really enjoy the finale.
10. The Ser Pounce.
I’ll miss you the most.
