Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (NBC, 9 p.m.) – Kathryn Erbe from Law & Order: Criminal Intent guest stars, as does rapper 2 Chainz. Please don’t ever forget that 2 Chainz used to be named Tity Boi.
Modern Family (ABC, 9 p.m.) – The whole family goes to a roller rink for a fund-raiser/party thing. VAN WILDER DID IT FIRST, YOU SCOUNDRELS.
Arrow (The CW, 8 p.m.) – From TV Guide: “With the Undertaking only days away, Malcolm dons his black hood to conclude business with seismologist Dr. Brion Markov and his team.” I have no idea what that means, but it sounds intense as sh*t. “Seismologist Dr. Brion Markov” would be a great name to use when you’re checking in at a hotel sometime. Just for fun.
Psych (USA, 10 p.m.) – GOD ENOUGH WITH THE STUFF ABOUT JULIET AND SHAWN STICK TO HIJINKS AND GOOFS.
Only In America With Larry the Cable Guy (History, 9 p.m.) – Larry the Cable Guy goes to an ostrich farm. There are people who will watch this.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Zoe Saldana and Bill Simmons on Kimmel; Michael Strahan and Natalie Maines on Letterman; Lauren Graham on Ferguson; Craig Ferguson and Connie Sawyer on Leno; Rachel Maddow and Zachary Quinto; and Simon Hedberg and John Collins on Conan.