Betty White’s Off Their Rockers (NBC, 8 p.m.) — How bad has it gotten for NBC? Betty White’s show has better ratings than Go On in the 18-49 demo. How does that feel, Matthew Perry? People under the age of 50 would rather watch a 90-year-old lady pull pranks than your bland sitcom.
NCIS (CBS, 8 p.m.) — Speaking of ratings, I was reading this post yesterday that attempted to put the ratings of The Walking Dead in perpective, and used NCIS as one of his examples. “In reality, The Walking Dead has lapped NCIS (the most watched show on TV) and every other broadcast drama in terms of advertising-friendly audience. It averaged a 5.32 18-49 rating this fall (and a 6.1 for the spring premiere), while NCIS is averaging a 3.46 with a high of 4.1.” In fact, the last scripted program to have ratings as good as The Walking Dead and The Big Bang Theory do in 2103 was Grey’s Anatomy SIX YEARS AGO. That’s insane. And oh yeah, in tonight’s NCIS, NCIS director Vance grieves over his dead wife or something.
Raising Hope (Fox, 8 p.m.) In tonight’s episode, Sabrina is visited by the Ghosts of Arbor Day past, present and future, and that is why I love Raising Hope. The end.
New Girl (Fox, 9 p.m.) — I would be remiss if I didn’t point you to the most delightful post on the Internet today: Jake Johnson discussing the best GIFs from Nick Miller on New Girl. My favorite quote: ” My thoughts on Max [Greenfield] by the way — and I spend every day with him, for over ten hours a day — he’s truly the dumbest boy I’ve ever been around.” Jake Johnson is Nick Miller.
The Mindy Project (Fox, 9:30 p.m.) — On tonight’s episode, Mindy gets to do a local news report. Over/under on Bridget Jones’ references: 5.
Justified — (FX, 9 p.m.) — My longshot, totally crackpot theory on the identity of Drew Thompson: Art.
LATE NIGHT LISTINGS: ALISON BRIE WILL BE ON THE DAILY SHOW. Consider yourself informed. Also, Michelle Williams is on Letterman, Robin Wright is on Leno, Anthony Edwards is on Kimmel, Ferguson has Jon Cryer, Fallon has David Spade, Conan has Andy Samberg, and, in case you missed it, ALISON BRIE WILL BE ON THE DAILY SHOW. Pants are optional.