8:00, ABC — Wipeout. Tonight’s episode features some sort of contraption called the “Tramp-O-Mean.” More like tramp-o-line! That’s what I always say.
8:00, History Channel — Modern Marvels. “Chrome is the subject. Included: a visit to 4 State Trucks in Missouri, where chrome is added to a truck.” More anti-faux-wood-paneling bias from the hacks at History Channel.
9:00, ABC — Rookie Blue. I’ve never seen this show, but I’m guessing it’s just like Ryan Caulfield: Year One. I am the only person in the entire world who remembers Ryan Caulfield: Year One.
9:00, ESPN – “The Decision.” This may break the record for longest commercial ever broadcast during prime time by a major network.
I’ll be back in the future to further demonstrate to you why you are bad at watching television. Your television is facing backwards! Why is it like that? Turn it around!