The Olympics (NBC) – The young woman pictured above is named McKayla Maroney. McKayla Maroney is a member of the United States women’s gymnastics team. She does exactly one event. She does this one event, the vault, better than anyone else in the world. By a lot. So while the rest of her team is doing all the other events tonight in the gymnastics team competition, McKayla Maroney will be focusing in on doing the one thing she does so well that it alone got her on the team, and when it’s time for her to do it, she will destroy everyone. McKayla Maroney is a boss. (If you want know who won, just Google it. NBC is dumb.)
Franklin & Bash (TNT) – I haven’t been doing recaps of this show because it hasn’t been nearly as silly as last season, and they take a long time, and it’s no fun to do them if I’m just going through the motions. Will I do one tomorrow? The ball’s in their court. No pressure.
White Collar/Covert Affairs (USA) – How sick do you think Piper Perabo is of hearing about Coyote Ugly? I bet she gets people yelling at her about fighting the moonlight and dancing on bars all the time. And then she’s probably all “I am on Covert Affairs now,” and people are like “WTF is a Covert Affairs? Sing that one song,” and she just screams until her lungs bleed.
Workaholics (Comedy Central) – Season 3 finale. FINALE? How is that even possible? It just came back like a month ago. No, this simply will not do.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Fred Willard on a repeat of Kimmel; Emma Stone on a repeat of Letterman; Rosie Perez on Ferguson; Jeff Daniels on Conan; Olympics all night on NBC, so no Leno or Fallon