The Bachelor (ABC, 8 p.m.) — Season finale. Apparently this was a strong season of The Bachelor, whatever that means, and tonight’s finale pits “Lindsay Yenter, 25, a petite substitute teacher from Fort Bragg, North Carolina” against “Catherine Giudici, 26, a quirky graphic designer from Seattle.” Based on the three seconds of research I did, I’m rooting for Catherine, pictured above. You can practically sink into that blue background.
The Carrie Diaries (The CW, 8 p.m.) — Sarah Jessica Parker thinks The Carrie Diaries is “odd.” If this news is of interest to you, you’re a longggggg way from home, my friend.
The Following (Fox, 10 p.m.) — “Carroll reaches out to Hardy with an unusual request.” It better involve Tremors somehow.
Burning Love (E!, 10 p.m.) — In a perfect world, instead of watching The Bachelor finale, everyone would watch this Bachelor spoof tonight. Then Kristen Bell and I run away together, because perfect world.
inside out: Bugs (Science, 10 p.m.) — “Discover the blueprint of insect global domination.” NOPE.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Michael Bloomberg and Depeche Mode on Letterman; Halle Berry and Rachel Maddow on Leno; George Hamilton on Ferguson; Timothy Olyphant and Justin Timberlake on Fallon; and Snoop Lion on Conan.