Portlandia (IFC, 10 p.m.) — Portlandia doesn’t officially return until next week, but IFC is airing a 15-minute mini-film, or something, called “The Celebrity Incident” tonight According to EW, “It stars Steve Buscemi as a down-on-his luck salesman trying to get the humble vegetable’s brand to take off; think of it as Glengarry Glen Ross meets Gil from The Simpsons.” So, Jack Lemmon meets being set on fire?
Billy Madison/Happy Gilmore (ABC Family, 7 p.m.) — Ways to start a brawl: ask a group of 30 year olds which movie is better, Billy Madison or Happy Gilmore? There will always be ONE GUY who says Mr. Deeds.
American Idol (Fox, 8 p.m.) — The top 13 finalists are revealed. FINALLY (?).
Inside the Actors Studio (Bravo, 8 p.m.) — The McConaissance continues.
The Olympics (NBC, 8 p.m.) — Don’t worry, Parks and Community are back next week, though if you’re hankering for some Greendale action NOW, Geeks Who Drink is doing a nationwide Community-themed pub quiz at 8 p.m. tonight. I call dibs on the Buttsoups.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Keri Russell on Letterman; Jonah Hill on Kimmel; Michelle Obama, Will Ferrell, and Arcade Fire on Fallon; Joseph Gordon-Levitt on Ferguson; Pete Holmes on Conan; Ronan Farrow on Stewart; and Stanley McChrystal on Colbert.