What’s On Tonight: A Slate Perfectly Suited To Your Finest $8 Bottle Of Wine

The Olympics (NBC, 8 p.m.) — Figure skating, snowboarding, women’s freestyle skiing, and women’s ski jumping. Unfortunately, the heterosexual male figure skating competition does not take place tonight.

New Girl (Fox, 9 p.m.) — Lindsay Weir alert! Linda Cardellini will play Jess’ sister in tonight’s episode, which will also feature a Winston dinner party and a crashed bar mitzvah.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine (Fox, 9:30 p.m.) — Boyle enthusiastically pursues a new romance, but Jake steps in to keep him from moving too quickly in a Valentine’s themed episode. Bring your eight dollariest bottle of wine.

Cougar Town (TBS, 10 p.m.) — Bobby overcomes his fear of roller coasters, and Andy bets Ellie she can’t stop being snarky for one day. An Ellie with no snark is a like alcohol-free beer. What’s the point?

Justified (FX, 10 p.m.) — Raylan is out for revenge after Alison is attacked. WHO DARE PUT A HAND ON AMY SMART? Related: Seeing Garth Brooks on The Tonight Show the other night, I couldn’t help but think he’d be a decent Art.

LATE NIGHT LISTINGS: Gary Oldman is on Kimmel; Bob Patterson’s very own Jason Alexander is on Ferguson; Elizabeth Kolbert is on The Daily Show, Charlie Crist is on Colbert, and Aubrey Plaza stops by Conan.

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