It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FXX, 10:00) – Season finale. The gang decides to spend Thanksgiving breaking bread with people they’ve hurt over the years. That’s a lot of broken bread. And now I’m kinda hoping Charlie turns into Jesus and feeds everyone with five loaves of bread and two milk steaks. I’m going to miss you, you horrible little sociopaths. Hurry back.
The League (FXX, 10:30 p.m.) – Taco opens a pubic barber shop. Bout time, I say.
South Park/Key & Peele (Comedy Central, 10-11:00 p.m.) – From TV Guide: “Cartman facilitates world peace with his latest prank, which brings religious leaders to South Park to witness the fulfillment of a Biblical prophecy.” Cartman gon’ Cartman.
Arrow (CW, 8:00 p.m.) – I still haven’t seen Arrow, but I have been getting a real kick out of reading the episode descriptions. Tonight, “Oliver and Canary are attacked by a trained killer from the League of Assassins.” See, that’s how you can tell the League of Assassins is a quality organization. If I had a dollar for every time a cabal of hitmen that I hired sent out an inexperienced killer, I’d have … well, zero dollars. But I’d have a hell of a story.
Law & Order: SVU (NBC, 9:00 p.m.) – Some sort of fake American Idol or something. You are welcome for the helpful analysis.
American Horror Story: Coven (FX, 10:00 p.m.) – Fiona and Myrtle fight for control of the coven. IN A STEEL CAGE. AT SUMMERSLAM. WITH GUEST REFEREE JAKE “THE SNAKE” ROBERTS. TWO WITCHES ENTER, ONE WITCH LEAVES.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Dr. Phil and Erin Andrews on Kimmel; Natalie Portman and Chris Elliott on Letterman; Martin Short on Ferguson; Ellen DeGeneres on Leno; Jason Statham and Tom Green on Fallon; and Aziz Ansari and Deepak Chopra on Conan.