Lorde Is 17 Years Old, Unless She Isn’t

By: 01.29.14  •  18 Comments

Lorde’s real name is ALLEGEDLY Ella Maria Lani Yelich-O’Connor. Lorde was ALLEGEDLY born on November 7, 1996. That means Lorde is ALLEGEDLY 17 years old. OR IS SHE? Yes, yes she is, but this is a real “scandal” that real people are talking about, so much so that the Hairpin requested, and received, a copy of her birth certificate.

lorde bitch certificate

Hm. This solves nothing; it looks like a print-out from your middle school computer in 1999. Then there’s this:

John Key, the New Zealand prime minister, and therefore man who said to Lorde “let me be your ruler”, played golf with Barack Obama, the Kenya-born president, in Hawaii the other day. (Via)

My god, this goes all the way to the top. Lorde is 17, Lorde is 49, Lorde is every age.

Banner via Getty Image, via the Hairpin

Around The Web