Has anyone been watching Lindsay Lohan’s trainwreck reality show on Oprah’s network? I haven’t, mostly because I have the Delaware of cable packages and I don’t get OWN, although I suppose I could probably find it fairly easy enough on YouTube or Hulu or something. Anyway, from the clips I’ve seen online, Linsday is predictably f*cking up left and right, skirting her responsibilities and flaking out — so in last night’s episode Lord Oprah sat her down for an epic calling of the bullsh*t.
Lindsay claims in the first video that she’s sober at this point, which I don’t believe for a second. I’m sorry, but there is zero chance this is the face of a 27-year-old woman who hasn’t consumed at least one entire bottle of vodka in the past 24 hours. But I feel like having been surrounded by liars and manipulators her entire life makes lying come so easy that most of the time the lines between fiction and reality are probably blurred even in her own head.
In the second video, Oprah tries to get a rise out of Lindsay by dropping the F-bomb and gives her a pep talk, telling her she has “heart intelligence,” not “head intelligence,” which is a really sweet way of telling Lindsay Lohan that she’s basically dumb.
Meanwhile, Reddit’s Watch It For the Plot has discovered another reason to be watching Lindsay, if you haven’t seen these before. JESUS — what kind of wizardry is this that they don’t just completely fall out? Inquiring minds with big boobs want to know.