Does anyone remember their first handjob with their significant other? Maybe it was in the car — following a sweaty, drunken night out, or in the morning after a sleepover, or even in the shower, or on the Atlantic City boardwalk at 5am. Odds are, you probably don’t remember it very clearly. Which is why this short film, First Handjob, takes the sometimes overlooked notion of the first handjob and romanticizes it by pairing up strangers to give each other handjobs for the first time on film. And the results are magic. What starts out as awkwardness quickly turns into a candid, beautiful moment between two people with O-faces and sticky hands. You just can’t bottle this kind of electricity.
See? Now that’s what all you dummies sharing the original First Kiss video on Facebook sounded like. (Now determined to be a hoax.) And just so you know it took real effort to feign that kind of sentimentality, mostly because I’m a terrible person and also married, which means that romance has been replaced with why the hell does he insist on putting lower shelf items in the refrigerator on the top shelf so when I try to take out the Brita pitcher, the dog food and peanut butter fall out all over the floor and PEANUT BUTTER DOESN’T NEED TO BE REFRIGERATED ANYWAY.
So you all just think about that next time you want to share something beautiful on the internet.