Future has a new single out called “I Won,” which is not my cup of tea but whatever. What I can comment on is Kanye West’s hilarious contribution to the single, in which he humblebrags minus the humble about how awesome Kanye West is that he caught the wild majestic horse of a trophy that is Kim Kardashian.
I don’t even know where to start, just look at this:
You the number one trophy wife
So it’s only right to live the trophy life
You grew up on J. Lo, Timberlands by Manolo now
Till one day I put an angel in your ultra sound
I want to dip that ass in gold, I want to dip that ass in gold
I made it over NBA, NFL players
So every time I score it’s like the Super Bowl
Baby, we should hit the south of France
So you could run around without them pants
I put that glacier on your little hand
Now that’s the only thing without a tan
My trophy on that Bound bike, I gave you only pipe
If people don’t hate then it won’t be right
You could look at Kylie, Kendall, Kourtney and Khloe
All your Mama ever made was trophies, right?
I took it upon myself to bold the most entertaining lines. Yes, Kanye. You won out over NBA players, NFL players, Ray J, Nick Cannon, and every other black dude who has ever been with Kim Kardashian. Well done.
For a guy who’s adept at consistently embarrassing himself, Kim Kardashian is somehow the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to Kayne West. If I had to explain it, I’d say Kanye West sold his soul to the devil in exchange for his music career and then the devil came knocking for his soul but the devil is actually Kris Kardashian and then the Bound 2 video happened.
That’s all I got.