Since I’m a married 30-something, I’ve never had any reason to pay much attention to modern social media dating apps like Tinder. So thankfully this young man was kind enough to put together a helpful tutorial for people like myself. In the video, he demonstrates what kind of photos attract the ladies the most: Selfies with puking, donkey-riding, karate poses, flashing police officers, graffiti fire and gangsters with roses all earn a resounding thumbs up from chicks who supposedly want to bang this guy.
If this dude’s online efforts actually translate into any real world success, then I weep for my gender. Every time he says “Bam! It’s a match!” I want to punch him a little bit harder. Danger wrote a thoughtful piece this weekend on why you shouldn’t go bananas hate-sharing things on the internet — but in this case, if me floating this out there prevents at least one woman from putting out for this sociopathic turd nugget, then I’ve done my job and the world is a better place.