If You’re Not Doing The ‘Prancercise’ Fitness Workout, You’re Not Exercising Right

Hey, you.

*looks around*

Yes, you, fatty.

What did you just call me?

A big fat bowl of fat.

First of all, that’s not a nice thing to call someone. Also, you can’t use fat twice in the same insult.

SHUT UP. YOU LOOK LIKE A STORE-BRAND SANDWICH STORAGE BAG THAT’S ONE MORE DROP OF PUDDING AWAY FROM EXPLODING.

That’s much better. Wait. Who the hell are you?

Name’s Rohrback, Joanna Rohrback, and I’m here to help you lose weight.

*pokes head out from chocolate cake box that appeared out of nowhere* You’d…you’d do that for me? But how?

With my patented Prancercise fitness workout. Got your lute mixtape ready? Good. Let’s begin.

The Miami New Times notes:

Prancercise LLC, which is a real company selling Rohrback’s idea of imitating a horse to achieve your perfect bikini body, started publishing videos to YouTube five months ago…The video’s just a companion to Rohrback’s book, Prancercise: The Art of Physical and Spiritual Excellence.

Rohrback’s website, prancercise.com, is careful to note that not everyone may benefit from the Prancercise lifestyle equally; Prancercise is just a report of what Rohrback has experienced herself, and does not constitute real medical advice. Also, despite the book’s cover showing two Rohrback twins prancing alongside a majestic white steed, “Any photos showing her moving along side a horse are not a suggestion that anyone should try such an act, but only a depiction of the technique she uses in her movement.” (Via)

Prance the pounds away.

(Via Videogum) (Via Miami New Times)

×