‘Our Non-Aisle Seats Are Not Suited For Someone Of Your Carriage’

10.17.12 5 years ago 70 Comments

We missed it when we watched the Broncos-Chargers Monday night game, but Busted Coverage spotted this mammoth Broncos fan space-eating in the front row of Qualcomm Stadium. Displaying the type of enterprise that bloggers only show when there’s fun to be made of fat people, BC called the folks at the Chargers ticket office to see how tubby here was able to get away with taking up the whole row.

We called the San Diego Chargers ticket office this afternoon and made up an outrageous story about wanting to buy tickets to an upcoming game, but a parent was gigantic and wouldn’t fit in a normal seat.


Because that scenario took place and was shown on ESPN during Monday Night Football. Look at Elway just chillin’ in the front row. Not a care in the world, especially for the blonde who’s sitting on her boyfriend/husband’s lap.

What did the Chargers tell us about fat people buying seats at Jack Murphy? Fat people can buy a special seat, called a transfer seat, which don’t have an arm on one side of the seat. So you get a little bit of extra space. But those seats are on the aisle, according to a Jack Murphy policies report.

“Looks like we got a flabby scofflaw here. Back to the aisle seat where you belong, sir. Don’t force us to get the cattle prod.”

Fun fact: Lucas Oil Stadium is 95 percent transfer seats.

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