Steve Smith: Still Scarier Than Gremlins

04.11.12 6 years ago 17 Comments

Steve Smith signed a three-year extension with the Panthers on Tuesday. If he is able to see it through, he’ll be baby-punching in Carolina until the ripe old age of 36. Were it not for Smith, the most heralded player in Panthers history might be Jake Delhomme (Cam Newton has arguably already overtaken him, but Cam has only played one season and sh*tty as Delhomme could be, he was their QB in the Super Bowl year.) and that’s too depressing to contemplate, even for a relatively young franchise like Carolina. But, hey, Jon Beason was really good before he went on IR.

Anyway, Smith wore a Gizmo shirt to the presser, which has people making “don’t feed Steve Smith after midnight” jokes. How about “don’t ask Steve Smith about his Mogwai shirt because he’s terrifying”.

Reporter: “Hey Steve, big Gremlins fan, huh? Gizmooooooo. Ha ha, love it!”

Steve Smith: “The f*ck you just yell at me!?”

Reporter: “Oh, heh heh. Yeah, it’s just from that movie on your shirt.”

Steve Smith: “There’s a movie playing on my shirt? You a lunchin’ ass motherf*cka. That’s stupid.”

Reporter: “No, no. The character on your shirt is from a movie.”

Steve Smith: “OH. Oh, I see. So you just gonna come and correct me in front of all these people. Like I need you to be my personal fact-checker. I just thought it look good and the color works, but you gotta let me know that I don’t know the whole story. Where I came up, you catch a beatdown for that sh*t. Matter of fact, why don’t you come on up here?”

Reporter: [Sh*ts pants and runs, possibly in that order]

It wasn’t long ago that we had to work to differentiate the two receiver Steve Smiths of the NFL, but the former Elisha security blanket and most recently underused wideout for the Eagles hasn’t been a figure worth mentioning in a while. Other Steve Smith (O.S.S.) also signed with the Rams earlier this month, so you might actually give him a thought come fantasy draft time when you start wondering who on that team is gonna get the bulk of Sam Bradford’s seven touchdown passes for the year.

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