Stoners! Do you have three years of experience? Knowledge of the demand cycle of cheeb? Do you care passionately about the quality of your smoking experience? Then Washington State has the job you’re looking for!
You might remember that in the last election, the state of Washington legalized marijuana for recreational use. Since most marijuana dealers aren’t exactly qualified for jobs that don’t involve serving Whoppers, the state finds itself looking for a Marijuana Consultant.
Jokes aside, Washington seems to have filed this under Liquor Control, and it is an actual, well-paying job that does require detailed knowledge of how marijuana is grown and consumed:
This Category includes, but is not limited to:
a. How Marijuana and/or Agricultural products are grown, cultivated, harvested, cured,
b. How Marijuana is infused into food and beverages
c. How Marijuana should be packaged, labeled, transported, and sold at retail level
d. How wholesale and retail Product should be recalled and accounted for
e. How Marijuana should be destroyed if over produced, contaminated, or recalled
That last, you burn it, guys. Duh.
You might be wondering how, precisely, somebody can get this job without admitting to a federal crime. Apparently Washington State believes there’s safety in numbers:
Note: The WSLCB understands that potential Proposers may have limited experience in
providing the expertise required in all Categories described above. In order to better leverage
resources available for performing the services required herein, the WSLCB recommends that
potential Proposers may form teams that combine their knowledge, skills, and abilities into one
(1) Proposal to meet the requirements as stated herein.
We expect a Hollywood comedy about this to be incoming aaaaaaany second now.