A Ryan Gosling Helpline Has Been Set Up For Fans Who Can’t Handle His Retirement

Did you hear about Ryan Gosling’s kinda-sorta retirement? Feeling down about the soon-to-be lack of Baby Goose in your life? How will you be able to get through life without hearing his “hey, girl” voice, except by watching The Notebook or Drive or Blue Valentine or Crazy, Stupid, Love or Half Nelson or Gangster Squad or Lars and the Real Girl or literally dozens of other movies and TV shows, as well as literally millions of videos online? By calling the Gosline, obviously (standard rates apply).

Website Blinkbox has established “The Gosline” to help fans deal with the news, with people able to ring the emergency number and listen to audio recordings of some of his most famous lines of dialogue. Included among the selections are a speech from the 2004 romantic comedy The Notebook, in which Gosling says: “So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s gonna be really hard. We’re gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day.” (Via)

*ring ring, ring ring, ring ring*

“Hey, girl.”
“OMG BABY GOOSE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I’M SO SAD YOU’RE RETIRING. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO…”
“Now, you just got a little boy’s father killed. And you almost got us killed. And now you’re lying to me. So how about this? From now on, every word out of your mouth is the truth. Or I’m going to hurt you.”
“…”

*hangs up*

(Via NME)

×