Men and women everywhere looked the way Coldplay songs sound (snotty tears) when news broke last week that Coldplay’s lead weeper Chris Martin is dating Jennifer Lawrence, your girlfriend who will have to remain imaginary…for now. They’ve apparently been together since June, three months after Martin and ex-wife Gwyneth Paltrow made their infamous “conscious uncoupling” announcement, meaning he’s currently in the second act of a three-act romantic comedy. J-Law’s the hot young thing, Paltrow the spurned wife, and if the movies have taught me anything, it’s that this story is going to end in an airport terminal with Martin playing a song on a battered acoustic guitar. But who’s he going to perform it to?
“Pizza-eating smoker” Jennifer Lawrence, obviously.
A source told the Sun on Sunday newspaper: “Chris feels he’s dating someone who has everything he’s been missing out on in the past 11 years. Jennifer doesn’t take herself too seriously and when she is not filming she just wants to hang out and have a good time.”
The actress, 24, is also said to have given the 37-year-old musician a “new lease of life” and the pair can’t stop laughing when they are together. (Via)
I love Jennifer Lawrence, but I guarantee she and Martin are insufferable together. Laughing at their own private jokes, calling each other “my sweet muffin” in public, making out at Coldplay concerts. WHY CAN’T I BE THE ONE WHO DOES ALL THAT WITH JEN — the Internet.